Of all mammals, the armadillo arguably possesses the best protection against punctures and jabs. Once it curls into a defensive sphere, the animal’s outer armor makes it all but impervious to the hazards it typically encounters, from coyote teeth to bobcat claws. If you believe the internet, the dillo’s hide is so tough that bullets sometimes bounce off it.
Contrast this with what is almost certainly the thinnest-skinned creature in nature—the prose writer.
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As a writer I’m always looking for insight into how to better use language to inform and persuade. On Christmas Eve I found just that in an unlikely place.
I was rummaging through my music collection in search of something other than the dozen or so seasonal standards that this time of year keep cycling on the radio (and in big-box stores, dentist offices, etc.). At the bottom of a stack of vinyl albums I uncovered something I’d forgotten I owned—a record purporting to contain Gregorian chants for Christmas.
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Any more you can’t get through the holidays without being made painfully aware of the parade of Christmas-themed Hallmark movies (and Hallmark knockoffs) airing on multiple cable channels and streaming online.
This outpouring of cinematic treacle begins well before Halloween and may even last until after New Year’s. I couldn’t say for sure when it ends because by January 1st I’ve usually sworn off confection of all kinds.
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In thirty years of earning my bread as a writer and editor I’ve identified a few principles of fundamental importance.
The one I wish to address at present I could have learned by heeding the repeated asides of the Spanish swordsman in The Princess Bride. Namely, that failing to ascertain the proper meaning of a word is one of the quickest ways to lose credibility as an auteur.
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Dave Dentel 